I read two books about grandmothers this month -You, with a View by Jessica Joyce and My Grandmother Sends her Regards and Apologies by Fredrick Backman – albeit of different genres.
Both books have a very similar premise, the grief of losing a grandmother and then embarking on a journey to find details about her past life. Joyce explores this mainly through contemporary romance while Backman explores the same connection and relationship but through the eyes of an almost-8 year old.
You, with a view follows a road journey which deepens emotional bonds while My grandmother sends her regards and apologies shows the reaction of a child to learning her granny’s unpalatable and unfair past while forming new relationships.
But the most important commonality in the books is the attitude of both grandmother’s towards the protagonist.
Clearly, it is a universal trait for grandmother’s to be the biggest cheerleaders of their grandchildren, the one person who is their advocate, their listener and their biggest motivation.
It may appear that they view their grandchildren through rose coloured glasses, but more often they are the only ones able to decipher the unspoken things in your heart, herald your fears and bolster your belief in both yourself and the world around you.
Grandmothers fight against the world for you, and they do so gladly with the understanding that this is their responsibility but also their joy. A job which they are so passionate about it cannot be put into words.
And so their loss is just as deep, just as insurmountable. Something which is impossible to put into words.
Both books manage to show different responses to the grief of losing a grandparent. One rejoicing in their grandmother’s past and the other resenting it because they are jealous of the time taken away from them.
Both opposite feelings which somehow manage to coexist.
Unexplainable and inexplicable at the same time.
